Orlando

We are still in Orlando.  This was not the plan but our hosts, Roy, Kim, Talon their new baby, Arya and their friend Selena have been so gracious and hospitable that we are having a hard time tearing ourselves away.  They are so nice that they are constantly reminding us where the door handle is, putting our shoes outside the front door, asking us when we are leaving, and just being generally great hosts.

They have a new baby named Arya who was born September 6.  She is a very cute little girl with a sweet disposition.  Mind you, since her vocabulary is limited, her requests for things tend to be loud, monosyllabic and at all times of the day and night.  It has been a long time since I have had babies around that it is a constant wonder to see how quickly they develop and change. Imagine going from knowing absolutely nothing to being able to walk, talk and interact in less than two years.  Watching Arya change and learn amazing new skills in only one week just blows me away.  Both Telen and I are learning new skills as well; holding the baby and passing her back to Mom when she cries and poops…

We all went out for Japanese food in celebration of Arya’s birth to a restaurant they went to when Talon was born seven years ago.  In keeping with our journey we were waited on by a flaming gay Japanese man with a southern accent. The food was very good and everyone over-indulged.

Florida Grasshopper

Telen and I were feeling like we needed some exercise.  We had been sitting in the car for quite a while since we finished the bike ride in Newfoundland and we were starting to feel kind of stale.   So we went to a nearby gym that Kim works at.  Talk about posh! State of the art equipment, they supplied towels for the showers and small towels to carry around to dab off the perspiration and wipe the equipment down.  The showers even had body wash and shampoo included.

Telen went for a deep-water exercise class and I headed over to the fitness equipment.  I thought I should warm up on the stationary cycle.  As soon as I got on the bike my bum and legs immediately set up a chorus of protest and dissent.  They were not happy.  In this heat and humidity warming up was not difficult.  It was not long before the little towel weighed more than the little fat cyclist.  Telen came out of the exercise class looking refreshed and energized while I simply looked dehydrated.

That evening we went to a dance class with our hosts.  This was a West-Coast Swing class.  Neither Telen or I had ever done West-Coast swing before so it was completely new to us.  It is always nice to try something new.  Apparently everyone else in the class had done this dance for years even though it was a novice class… or, at least that’s how it felt.  Telen picked it up right away and looked great and I did my usual.  At the end of the class the instructor stood in the middle of the studio with her hair in disarray amidst the shattered mirrors, chandeliers swinging by bare wires with sparks flashing, overturned chairs and pictures hanging askew on the walls and made me promise to never, ever come back.

I had fun, anyway…

Tonight we are going to a performance by Talon and his dancing partner Sidney.  Talon and his partner are both seven years old.  It should be fun to watch.  Kind of a mini-version of “So you think you can dance”.  I hope they let me in the studio…

The weather here has been interesting.  I have never seen such bizarre rain.  It comes down in incredible torrents amidst bolts of lightning, and crashes of thunder for up to 15 minutes, then it is gone and it appears as if nothing has happened.  This has occurred many times since we have been here interspersed with very hot, humid sunny weather.  Apparently this is normal.

After the Rain

Since we have been here we have become addicted to the Game of Thrones mini-series.  I have read the first book of the series but seeing enacted gives it a new life.  I got Roy addicted to coffee and this is payback.  He knows that when we leave here we will not have access to this.   I can hear him snorting, chortling and even sometimes full out maniacal laughing in the background.  He is an evil man!

Tomorrow we all leave for St. Petersburg on the Gulf of Mexico side of Florida. Apparently it has a fabulous beach and warm water.  I am always up for a beach day or two.  If the heat and humidity get to be too much we can always take a dip in the ocean.  Think about that:  If the high percentage of water in the air becomes too oppressive you immerse yourself in one hundred per cent water.  How does that work?

After that we head towards New Orleans. 

At least that’s the plan.

The Mouse Trap

We have made it to the “Mouse Trap” as the people here refer to Orlando.  We made it through the Carolinas and Georgia unscathed and uninjured.  I think the US government recruited or placed all their military personnel in this part of the country.  The places we stayed at were rife with uniforms, flags and patriotic sentiment.  Telen told me to keep my mouth shut and we just might survive.  She was right, as usual.  Object lesson to me:  keeping my opinions to myself has survival value. 

The freeway going through Jacksonville was, I think, designed by the roller-coaster imagineers from Disney.  The road dipped, turned and twisted for no apparent reason. It was a three-dimensional maze.  There were cars above you, below you, beside you and I swear I saw some cars just going around and around and around.  They must have had a Bogo on concrete when they build it because there did not seem to be any reason for most of the structure.  At one point I thought we had turned around and headed back northward for a while.

Outside of Jacksonville we ran into rain like we have never seen.  We could see the rainstorm ahead on the road.  It looked like we were approaching a wall.  When we hit the storm it was like driving through a car wash complete with soap, wax and power wash.  With the windshield wipers going full speed we could barely see the road ahead of us.  And this was on the freeway.  It lasted a few minutes and then we were out in the sunshine again.  A few minutes later it happened again.  By the third time it was getting monotonous.

The vegetation seemed to change completely as we crossed the border into Florida.  Palm trees everywhere.  The grass became coarser and thicker and the trees are covered in Kudzu vines.  And hot!  We just came across Canada in the hottest summer in a long while yet down here we feel like we have not adapted to the heat at all. 

Kudzu vines covering everything

We are staying with some great old friends here for a few days here.  They just had a brand new baby so we won’t staying long.  They are the penultimate hosts and are coping so well it is like a nothing happened.  Of course the baby is beautiful.

Today we all went for a stroll around a nearby lake.   We had a close encounter with an alligator.   This is not something you see back home.  The other thing we discovered is that there are numerous poisonous snakes in Florida.  Back home we might see an occasional salamander and a garter snake – here you see alligators and water moccasins.  We also saw a grasshopper that was easily 8 centimeters in length. 

The Alligator encounter.  It was about 6 feet long

The southern accent seemed to disappear when we got into Florida.  As we worked our way down the eastern states the southern American accent seemed to get thicker and more unintelligible.  We were in a grocery store in Georgia and a gentleman was kibitzing with one of the clerks and we could not understand a thing either of them was saying.  Since we crossed into Florida the accent is more like the west coast.  Mind you, “Thank-you” still sounds like “Uh-huh”.

I think there must be money in Florida.  All the houses here are large and well kept.  The roads are wide and in excellent repair.  We saw numerous huge Outlet Malls with the parking lots completely full of late model cars.  If there isn’t lots of money, then there is incredible debt. 

As we were driving today our friend Roy (who is from Canada) was mentioning that since we arrived he has reverted to some of his Canadian ways such as using his signal lights.  He said that using signal lights here is considered a sign of weakness.